My thoughts on early transitioning.

Marissa’s guide to male to female gender transitioning.

So I’ve been thinking about coming up with this “list” with items I think are most important in gender transitioning.

Sure we might all do it differently and take different approaches to achieve same goal but ultimately, we all want to succeed at “passing” and blending into society.

Why is passing important? This is a question that repeatedly seems to come up and it’s somewhat complex. My SO used to get fairly upset with me while voicing my goal of passing and she would repeatedly ask why passing is so important, since there are CIS women in a variety of different formats and body shapes and society puts too much emphasis on our looks. This is very true, but we don’t necessarily want to look very pretty, we’re just trying to avoid unnecessary attention. Unnecessary attention to me in this case means people looking it at you on the street or poking fun at you, or misgendering you in public, which can be a very hurtful experience. I’m basing the following strictly on my experience and is not meant to be used as a guide, merely a list of suggestions.

Continue reading “My thoughts on early transitioning.”

An interesting read about genders within native communities before Europeans changed it all??

Before European Christians Forced Gender Roles, Native Americans Acknowledged 5 Genders

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It wasn’t until Europeans took over North America that natives adopted the ideas of gender roles. For Native Americans, there was no set of rules that men and women had to abide by in order to be considered a “normal” member of their tribe.

Continue reading “An interesting read about genders within native communities before Europeans changed it all??”

14 months already? My brother has completely turned around and I’ve gone blonde, then red, yes surgery is coming and I can hardly wait. Running keeps getting better. Oh yes, I’m going to be single and accidents happen…

Already? It’s been forever since I’ve added to my blog. It’s not because nothing important has happened, quite the contrary, but rather because my focus has been elsewhere and most of the things happening in my life aren’t really trans related.

I can’t believe that it’s been over a year since I started popping the little blue pills. I honestly never thought that I would full time by now. I really wasn’t convinced that I will be able to pull off being Marissa 24/7 without significant surgical intervention. Luckily, I was wrong. I’m honestly not sure that much has changed since the 8-10 month mark, but I do know for sure that my boobs are growing pretty nicely, yes the left one is still growing a bit faster than the right but they are taking shape. People tell me I look different since the summer, but I am having a hard time noticing the difference. Although, I should point out that I never actually saw changes in my face, but that’s because I see myself in the mirror all the time.

Continue reading “14 months already? My brother has completely turned around and I’ve gone blonde, then red, yes surgery is coming and I can hardly wait. Running keeps getting better. Oh yes, I’m going to be single and accidents happen…”

I am full time and can never go back, thinking about…… yes the knife but its complicated. Oh yes paperwork and MONEY, swear (pronoun jar)

So I have been full time for 2 week now and I really feel amazing. 2 years ago I didn’t think that this was possible. I feel free. Can’t really find a better way to put it. I am very genuinely excited about every single day despite issues with my business, dealing with VERY high maintenance clients and a bunch of other stuff. I feel like nothing can drag me down. Instead of dreading the future, I can hardly wait for it. Bring it on. It’s hard to believe I’ve been on E for 9 months now, feels like it was all yesterday when I anxiously popped my first pill then spent the next 3 hours panicking about what a DVT will feel like.  Continue reading “I am full time and can never go back, thinking about…… yes the knife but its complicated. Oh yes paperwork and MONEY, swear (pronoun jar)”

8 months of HRT,I need to go full time, but…..Family frustrations, Hair and makeup, pronouns, why do you look like a woman now?????

The concept of going full time is becoming ever more pressing. Switching between my 2 personalities is just really hard and I’m not very keen on keeping my old self around for much longer. I find him boring, annoying, and somewhat depressing. I need to be me. My fears of not passing have been easing a lot lately because I’m fortunate enough that seem to pass when trying all the time which is really helpful. I admire people who don’t care about what others think, but passing for me is a big deal, even though it makes me feel like a coward sometimes. Continue reading “8 months of HRT,I need to go full time, but…..Family frustrations, Hair and makeup, pronouns, why do you look like a woman now?????”

To Heel or Not to Heel, funny stereotypes and girls obviously don’t do that…..

I must be really frank, I’m not even sure why I’m posting this but I had a revelation last week. On Friday I had to go see a client and I wanted to look somewhat professional. I wore a dressy shirt with pants and very light makeup. These ppl have seen me my old self before and only one of them knew of the new me but I’m really getting to the point where I don’t even care so much about explaining myself ahead of time. Continue reading “To Heel or Not to Heel, funny stereotypes and girls obviously don’t do that…..”

Out to the world, you cannot hide who you are.

So I am now officially out to the world.

I came out on Facebook using he following letter;

Dear Friends,
For months, if not years, I’ve been contemplating how best to address a major change in my life.

Some of you know, most of you don’t and no doubt it will be a surprise or even a shock to a few. I am transgender and have been in the process of transitioning to female for almost a year now, which is the reason I haven’t exactly been posting pictures of myself here. Although I don’t want to impose the particulars on you, if you have any questions, I’d be more than happy to answer them. I would however like to point out that I’m still the same person and nothing has changed since you first met me, except I got tired of fighting it. This has been with me all my life and finally after many years of struggle, I decided to embrace it and fix it. This change will not affect my ability to do my job or make me a different person really, other than on the outside. In fact, I may be less distracted when I no longer have two personas to juggle and I can be just myself without having to act or pretend to be something I’m not. Also, as I enjoy being myself more, you may find me more enjoyable to be around.Some of you may not understand the life changes I’m undertaking and some of you may not approve of what I’m doing and that’s fine. I did not come here to ask for permission, I’m only here sharing this because I think it’s only fair.

Continue reading “Out to the world, you cannot hide who you are.”